Post by vanynessa on Dec 3, 2007 1:21:25 GMT -5
I watched Coda .....again. I cried.......again, but at different scenes this time. I used to ball when Chakotay was trying to revive Janeway and he was crying over her body. This time I became emotional during B'Elanna's speech about her becoming a better person because Janeway had faith in her:
She saw something in me that I didn’t see,
and she saw a worthwhile person, where I saw a lost and hostile misfit.
And because she had faith in me, I began to have faith in myself.
And when she died the first thing I thought was that I couldn’t do this without her, that I needed her too badly; and her strength, and her compassion….
But then I realized that the gift that she gave me, and gave a lot of us here, was the knowledge that we are better and stronger than we think.
I felt a pain in my heart as I listened, knowing that there is no Janeway to have faith in me at work, not at the lab anyway. I can't do anything right for them, no matter how hard I try. If people see you as a loser long enough, you start to believe it, too, and it makes dragging myself out of bed torture come Mondays. I mean literally TORTURE. It's so different from when I work once a month at the vet clinic. My supervisor there, Sharon, is just like Janeway. She is a friend, a confidant, and is one of the smartest, sweetest people I know. Like Janeway she can do anything and encourages others to learn and grow. She has total faith in my abilities. In Sharon's eyes there's nothing I can't learn or do. I wish my full time job was like that. *sigh*
Anyway, I found this Coda video on Youtube, and now my depression knows no bounds. It's beautifully done, and tells the story as if Janeway never made it through. It's terribly sad but completely worth the tears just to see this stunning story so impeccably done........
PART 1 Janeway dies........
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFFvTjw2BII
PART 2 She's gone..........
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-EpoFHqz1I
She saw something in me that I didn’t see,
and she saw a worthwhile person, where I saw a lost and hostile misfit.
And because she had faith in me, I began to have faith in myself.
And when she died the first thing I thought was that I couldn’t do this without her, that I needed her too badly; and her strength, and her compassion….
But then I realized that the gift that she gave me, and gave a lot of us here, was the knowledge that we are better and stronger than we think.
I felt a pain in my heart as I listened, knowing that there is no Janeway to have faith in me at work, not at the lab anyway. I can't do anything right for them, no matter how hard I try. If people see you as a loser long enough, you start to believe it, too, and it makes dragging myself out of bed torture come Mondays. I mean literally TORTURE. It's so different from when I work once a month at the vet clinic. My supervisor there, Sharon, is just like Janeway. She is a friend, a confidant, and is one of the smartest, sweetest people I know. Like Janeway she can do anything and encourages others to learn and grow. She has total faith in my abilities. In Sharon's eyes there's nothing I can't learn or do. I wish my full time job was like that. *sigh*
Anyway, I found this Coda video on Youtube, and now my depression knows no bounds. It's beautifully done, and tells the story as if Janeway never made it through. It's terribly sad but completely worth the tears just to see this stunning story so impeccably done........
PART 1 Janeway dies........
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFFvTjw2BII
PART 2 She's gone..........
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-EpoFHqz1I
